Marriage Struggles: The Reality of Porn

Some of our struggles in marriage come from the world, and some we invite in. Pornography is one of the latter. There was a time when it took a lot of effort for someone to look at pornography. You had to actually get out of your house and go somewhere to buy it, or you had to order it and wait for it to come to your house in the mail. Either way was a risk—no one wanted to get caught buying porn. Fast-forward to today, and it is one click away on whatever device is in front of you—and no one will know. Most of the constraints that helped people resist porn in the past are gone. The “privacy” connected with porn’s accessibility today can make a person feel safe and pretend there is no harm. I think those are two of the biggest lies in our culture today. First, somebody knows. Second, there is harm.

I’d like to speak directly to each of you husbands. Don’t convince yourself that porn will not harm you or your marriage. Your wife will find out, and it will crush her and break the trust she had in you. She will ask the question I have heard many women ask: “Why are you looking at that when you have me?” It puts images in your mind that only God can erase. That next click can bring a struggle into your marriage that you regret for a long time.

In last week’s blog, I talked about Jesus’ promise to be there for us in our struggles because He has overcome the world. Guess what? He is here to help us not only in the struggles the world brings into our marriages but also in the struggles we bring into our marriages. If porn is a part of your life, it is a part of your marriage. It does not belong in either. I challenge you to take that first step today to remove it from both.

Here are few resources that can help you if you need accountability in this area: 

Here are a few other resources to check out if you're struggling in this area: